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1. |
Blackest Dream
03:14
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No one ever knew that you were dying inside
No one ever saw your blackest dream
Clouds can’t catch you when you’re falling
No one’s gonna hear you scream inside your head
You little deviant thing
Just try to fit inside this box
Pain killers
Joy-juice on the rocks
I painted the outside with rainbows and daffodils
Just take your happy pills
Everything’s fine
Everything’s fine…
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2. |
Trapped Like A Ghost
05:27
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You live in reality
And when you close your eyes at night you see the imaginary
Now let’s imagine for a minute that I am just the opposite
In my dreams I reach you
But when I wake up I am just a phantom
You can’t see me
I can’t feel a thing
You’ve got me trapped like a ghost inside my head
You’ve got me suffocating in my bed
So sing me a lullaby
As I gasp for air
Why don’t you sing me goodbye?
Don’t make me lie here in your silence
In your silence
Why don’t you sing me goodbye
As I die
You live in a pretty dream house
And when you step outside
Well, that’s your life so you’re making it count
Now let’s imagine for a minute that I am just the opposite
In these walls I need you
But when I reach out I am just a shadow
And you walk right through
You walk right through me
You’ve got me trapped like a ghost inside my head
You’ve got me suffocating in my bed
So sing me a lullaby
As I gasp for air
Why don’t you sing me goodbye?
Don’t make me lie here in your silence
In your silence
Why don’t you sing me goodbye
As I die
I don’t know what’s going on dear
But it’s the strangest thing
Sometimes I swear I feel this presence
Haunting, wanting inside me
And when I look in the mirror I only see vapor rise
I rub my eyes
I swear I’m alive
Why aren’t you listening?
You’ve got me trapped like a ghost inside my head
You’ve got me suffocating in my bed
So sing me a lullaby
As I gasp for air
Why don’t you sing me goodbye?
Don’t make me lie here in your silence
In your silence
Why don’t you sing me goodbye
As I die
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3. |
Tourniquet
04:23
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I can tell my body what to do, what to do
Baby, I can tell my body what to do
With the switch of a button on my brain
Like a miracle
I can turn the agony to nothing
I’ve got a handle on my sharp pain, shuddering
Blindfold, tourniquet, mind-fuck, and cauterize
I can’t handle the pain
Suck it up
So suck it up already
Ahh, exposed wire throwing sparks
Oh god, I’ve got to touch it
Ahh, I cut the nerves to my heart
With a blunt butter knife
Ahh, the pyro-fire on my skin
Oh god, I’ve got to feel it
Ahh, the numbing needles coming it
Scratch
Scratch it out
I can tell my body what to do, what to do
Baby, I can tell my body what to do
With the switch of a button on my brain
Like a miracle
I can turn the agony to nothing
I’ve got a handle on my sharp pain, shuddering
Blindfold, tourniquet, mind-fuck, and cauterize
I can’t handle the pain
Suck it up
So suck it up already
Look at all the pretty colors of the glass
Shattered on the asphalt
I cut the nerves to my
My bloody knees with a
A dirty hack-saw
Ahh, red burning brand
Push it in my skin you sick little control freak
Ahh, I broke the mirror with my hand
Because I know which one’s the real me
I can tell my body what to do, what to do
Baby, I can tell my body what to do
With the switch of a button on my brain
Like a miracle
I can turn the agony to nothing
I’ve got a handle on my sharp pain, shuddering
Blindfold, tourniquet, mind-fuck, and cauterize
I can’t handle the pain
Suck it up
So suck it up already
Fast expanding pupils filling up my eyes
I see through the sky
Hyper-active nervous-systematic fiend
I feel EVERYTHING
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4. |
Play With Fire
04:26
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I find it hard to keep my self control
‘cause you don’t give me any reason
I’ll tell you anything you wanna know
All of my dirty dark secrets
So find me
Oh, find me my home
And then I’ll burn it down with matches
‘cause you know we shouldn’t be left alone
Or we’ll make angels in its ashes
Swimming distance from the shore
Strap my feet and stay aboard
As I face the ocean floor
I will never leave this boat
Water rising all around
Elevates my fear to drown
Still I let it pull me down
‘cause it feels better not to float
I find it hard to keep myself away
I’ve been known to play with fire
I told myself I wasn’t gonna stay
But you keep making me a liar
So show me
Show me how
How you can turn off all emotion
‘cause you know this should end right now
Or we’ll start sinking in the ocean
Swimming distance from the shore
Strap my feet and stay aboard
As I face the ocean floor
I will never leave this boat
Water rising all around
Elevates my fear to drown
Still I let it pull me down
‘cause it feels better not to float
I drink the sour and sweet like lemonade
I feel the sting as you pull the bandaid
I’m stuck thinking ‘bout future memories
And all the ones that I let slip by me
A memory for every single wasted day
A memory for everything that went the wrong way
A memory for every dream that I gave up
A memory for every girl I never got to love
I’ve got a heart that was made for polygamy
An adolescent echo ripe with envy
I can show you how resolve will atrophy
How self destruction never really did hurt me
Swimming distance from the shore
Strap my feet and stay aboard
As I face the ocean floor
I will never leave this boat
Water rising all around
Elevates my fear to drown
Still I let it pull me down
‘cause it feels better not to float
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5. |
Dandelion
03:43
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Say anything but the words I want for you to say
Be mean to me
You might help these feelings go away
Yeah, all I need
Wipe that fucking smile from off your face
I hope to be treated with your malice and disdain
Dandelion
Moths and butterflies and bittersweet
Dandelion
Terrifying stance at six foot three
Dandelion
How’d you get your roots wrapped up on me?
Dandelion
You are awfully lovely for a weed
Voice in my head says to the ledge “Let’s jump and fall again”
Now we say goodbye to the butterflies
I like that kind of pain
It has dawned on me you might just like the way that ginger tastes
Please pity me
I’m asking you to shove it in my face
Dandelion
Moths and butterflies and bittersweet
Dandelion
Terrifying stance at six foot three
Dandelion
How’d you get your roots wrapped up on me?
Dandelion
You are awfully lovely for a weed
Dandelion
You are awfully lovely for a weed
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6. |
Empty Shell
05:08
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I saw you through the narrow tunnel-vision
There was nothing else in sight
Just a longing to turn potential to kinetic and escape
Then an explosion of fire sent me rushing
With a force the speed of light
Through the surface of the skin
Through the muscle
To the cage where your heart was held
And in a moment of rapture I was there
Inside the lush red chamber
Where your soul could harbor mine
And the moment was so perfect I could cry
Until the rhythm pounded once
And then it died
What have I done?
That wicked gun
I didn’t know of my design
Beneath me fell
An empty shell
I was a bullet the whole time
Wake up love
Wake up love
I only held you for a second
So please resurrect
All of these ashes we could rise above
Wake up love…
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7. |
Midnight Sun
03:24
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White gun powder
You just touched up your face, don’t matter
You can scream much louder
Now that you’re face down
‘cause it’s easier just to belong
Muscles firing
Electric current
I can feel you trying don’t
You know it’s pointless
It’s just easier to play the carrion In his claws
Mister Monster
You’re the only one who ever threatens me
Oh Mister Man
You think I can’t control you but I can
I’ll make you come
I’ll make you come
Like a moth to the midnight sun
Black lace bait
Now he’s watching closely
Wants it wrapped around your throat
Try not to choke
‘cause it’s just easier to play along
White gun powder
You just touched up your face, don’t matter
You can scream much louder
Now that you’re face down
It’s just easier to play along in his game
Mister Monster
You’re the only one who ever threatens me
Oh Mister Man
You think I can’t control you but I already am
I’ll make you come
I’ll make you come
Like a moth to the midnight sun
My blue light special never fails to draw you in
Mesmerizing your eyes
While I crawl underneath your skin
Mister Monster
Mister Man
You don’t know this but I know you like the fingers on my hand
I’ll make you come
I’ll make you come
Like a moth to the midnight sun
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8. |
Making Monsters
03:57
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The story of the zombie isn’t quite right
There are no dead ones walking limp
We are the innocent
Tricked by dirty little monsters
Fallen prey to their bitter hearts
‘cause someone got them in the dark
And shot them in their hearts
They got them in the dark
And shot them in their hearts
And they may be alive
But they’re still dead inside
Dead inside
You are the undead walking the earth
You said you loved me
But, baby I know that you’re just hungry
With your eyes wide open and your fingers tight
Gripping your pistol as I scream in the night
You got me in the dark
And shot me in the heart
You got me in the dark
And shot me in the heart
You made a monster
And I may be alive
But I’m still dead inside
Dead inside
I’ve got your love, baby
But I want blood, baby
Give me your brain, lover
I’ll numb the pain for ya
Over love’s cemetery the moon shines bright
But there’s a stirring underneath the ground
We all died from the poison of a bitter love
But we eventually came around
And with our fingernails carrying clumps of dirt
Our hair matted and our clothes all ripped
We’re gonna find some innocent unsuspecting lovers
And we’ll share the poison on our lips
We’re making monsters
And we may be alive
But we’re still dead inside
Dead inside
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9. |
Rewindery
03:12
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Fancy a trip to the rewindery?
Where everything you find will be
Exactly what you want
But didn’t know it was exactly what you wanted while you had it
Now it’s gone
Fancy a trip to the rewindery?
Where everything you find will be
Exactly where you left it
If your memory is effective
Which, in almost every case it’s really not
Oh the most desirable feeling is reliving anything
The way it was
The way it was
Wait a minute…
Stop jacking all the glory and embezzling the truth
You’ve got no proof
But you’ve sure got some nerve don’t you baby?
If you’re gonna hack it up
That moral tale won’t mean shit
If you’re gonna censor it
Welcome to our little picture show
Hi
Incase you didn’t know I’m here to warn you about retro-vertigo
You might get sick
See, we show it like it was
Take all the filters off because
It seems that filthy little filter in your brain has done enough damage, dammit
I’m not calling you a liar
I just get the sense
You open up your mouth and truth just has this way of getting bent
Stop jacking all the glory and embezzling the truth
You’ve got no proof
But you’ve sure got some nerve don’t you baby?
If you’re gonna hack it up
That moral tale won’t mean shit
If you’re gonna censor it
Fancy a trip to the rewindery?
Where everything you find will be
Exactly what you want
But didn’t know it was exactly what you wanted while you had it
Now it’s gone
Oh the most desirable feeling is reliving anything the way it was
The way it was…NOT
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10. |
Symbiotic Stare
03:30
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I split myself in two
Gave one to you and one to you
Now What am I left with?
Just a symbiotic stare
It doesn’t compare
It doesn’t compare to being whole
So you take passion and emotion
And I’ll take wisdom and be wise
We could go our separate ways
But within days we’ll find our way
To some asylum
Numbing needles in our veins
I split my brain in two
Gave one to you and one to you
Oh, what was I thinking?
While the right walks in aimless illusion
Left, she knows no color
Knows no dream
You can take the thrill and all the wonder
And I’ll take wisdom and be wise
We could go our separate ways
But within days we’ll find ourselves
In a sweet straight-jacket embrace
How many mirrors must I break?
Before I only have one face?
Symbiotic stare…
How can we coexist with a purpose we don’t share?
I split my heart in two
Gave one to you and one to you
Oh, what have I done now?
While the right drowns in indigo
Left, she grows faint
As the red runs lower and lower
You can take the promise of potential
And I’ll take experience and pain
We can go our separate ways
But within minutes, within seconds
We both are sure to drain and empty
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11. |
Very Long Shadow
04:40
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Someday, My dear
We’ll talk of fear like an old friend
Embracing the cold sweat
Impending doom of this brilliant youth
The dew on the flowers will dry
As hard as we try to stay the same
Life is just a very long shadow
My body between the sun and the ground
But the eyes in the trees
And the burning breeze
And the finch and the sparrow will see
The ground between the sun and me
Someday, My dear
We’ll talk of pain like the master
Embracing the clenching jaw, the sharp knife
Breaking bone, the shrieking cry
We’ll welcome the silence that comes
No more commotion in our lungs
Night is just a very long shadow
The east lies between the sun and the west
And the stars they gleam
And the bullfrogs sing
And the finch and the sparrow, they sleep
While the moon pulls the weight of the tides of the sea
And life is just a very long shadow
My body between the sun and the ground
Life is just a very long shadow
My body between my god and me
…whoever that might be
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My Fair Fiend Utah
With haunting vocal melodies floating over instrumental syncopation that dances playfully then diverges into discordant
rock, My Fair Fiend displays a kind of intense fragility that is uniquely theirs.
My Fair Fiend was founded in 2013 in Orem, Utah by Callie Crofts (lead vocals/guitar/songwriting) and Zac Bryant (Drums).
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