My Fair Fiend

by My Fair Fiend

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    My Fair Fiend self titled debut album, released August 2013. Compact Disc in digipak packaging.
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credits

released August 20, 2013

All songs written by Callie Moore except:
“Caged” written by Callie Moore and Austin Cross
Performed by My Fair Fiend

Callie Moore - Guitar, ukulele, vocals
Austin Cross - Lead guitar, Piano on “Crystal Eyes”, vocals on “Caged”
Zac Bryant - Drums, vocals on “Unresolved”, background vocals
Adam Crofts - Bass

Recorded at Annex Recording in Draper, Utah
Produced by Callie Moore and Giles Reaves
Recorded, mixed, and mastered by Giles Reaves
Additional keys, percussion, and soundscapes by Giles Reaves

Album design by Callie Moore
Photography by Zac Bryant

Special thanks to:
Giles and Annex Recording, Adam and Vince, Michael Sullivan, Michael Baldwin, Lucas Pencak, all of our families, friends, and the fans that made this album possible.

Copyright 2013 Callie Moore

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about

My Fair Fiend Utah

With hauntingly soothing vocal melodies floating seamlessly over instrumental symbiosis that dances playfully then diverges into melancholy discordant rock, My Fair Fiend displays a kind of intense fragility that is uniquely theirs.
My Fair Fiend was founded in 2013 in Orem, Utah with members Callie Crofts (guitar/vocals), Zac Bryant (drums)
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Track Name: Murder a Dream
How do you murder a dream?
Wrap your long fingers around its small throat
Watch the light fade away
While it’s trying to scream
Say “I brought you into this world and I will take you out of it!”
How you do see the moon
And accept that it’s too far away?
It’s enough work just climbing the mountains
We can’t all be astronauts

And the angels in my head say
“Baby, just stick to your singing. These tantrums get old”
But I want what I can’t have
I want what I can’t have
I want what I can’t have
I’m done

How do you silence a song
When its one single purpose is just to be heard
Can I just let it sing?
No
No that’s far too risky a thing
When the message is such childish blasphemy
Truth
How do you just accept
That it’s got to be strangled to death?

And the angels in my head say
“Baby, that’s quite enough singing. Try silence instead.”
But I want what I can’t have
I want what I can’t have
I want what I can’t have
I’m done

There’s a bright little light in the line of my vision
It’s blocking my view and I can’t see the night
The black holes in my skull dilated to crushing the irises
Crowding too close to the white
And there’s nothing more beautiful
No, there’s nothing more beautiful

And the angels in my head say
“Baby, just let it go....”
But I want what I can’t have
I want what I can’t have
I want what I can’t have...
I want what I can't have
I want what I can't have
I want what I can't have...
I’m done
Track Name: Caged
I heard a songbird singing on my front door step
I never will forget
Didn’t know nobody could whistle like that
And so I caught him
Made him my own little pet
Built him an apartment with a view
Popsicle sticks and Elmer's glue

Hear the sound of silence leaving
Little songbird gently singing

Watch the other birds fly away
Caged and broken I’m bound to stay
In this hell
My feathers dried and cracked from the glue
I’m never singing for you

Hear the sound
I used to spread my wings
Of silence leaving
Why did you build this prison?
Little song bird gently singing
Why can’t you understand my desperate screaming?

Oh, don’t even try to hold back
I will have everything I want
You’ll understand in time that you’re mine
So just sing your song
Track Name: Crystal Eyes
Here comes another morning
You've gotta figure out this restlessness soon
It's just a small case of some harmless insomnia
You didn't listen to the warnings
She robbed you in the night
While you stayed awake and watched it happen
Look at your face in the mirror
You thought you were a younger man
Where did she go?
You want her back again

Just when you thought you had the world tamed
Here comes a lion, eyes glowing and she's stalking you
Forgot about the food chain
Or did you think that you were at the top?
Sweet Crystal Eyes, She lies
She never really satisfies you
Poor poor sad little junkie
Thought you really found a love worth fighting for

Here comes another night alone
You wonder how you’re gonna do this on your own
You hug your knees in the corner praying for a fix
This cold sweat’s making you sick
She’s got a lot of tricks
But you need her
You thought you were a stronger man
You try to leave her
But you just keep going back again and again

Just when you thought you had the world tamed
Here comes a lion, eyes glowing and she's stalking you
Forgot about the food chain
Or did you think that you were at the top?
Sweet Crystal Eyes, She lies
She never really satisfies you
Poor poor sad little junkie
Thought you really found a love worth fighting for

Ohhhh.....
“Don’t listen to them, baby.” she says
“I’m all you need in this world.”

Here comes a lion, eyes glowing and she's stalking you
Forgot about the food chain
Or did you think that you were at the top?
Sweet Crystal Eyes, She lies
She never really satisfies you
Poor poor sad little junkie
Thought you really found a love worth fighting for
Sweet Crystal Eyes
She’ll tie you to your demons
Lock you up and watch you while you scream
She’ll blow away your wildest dreams
And then you’re never gonna dream again
You’ll hear her voice inside your head long after she’s gone
So be careful what you live for, baby
‘cause we don’t live long
Track Name: Raindrops
Raindrops falling in the puddle
Won’t stop me running through the street
You won’t find me looking for some cover
My mother keeps calling from the porch
She’s gonna scold me later ‘cause she knows of course
Somehow I’m bound to get my feet wet

She says “A cold is gonna catch you, catch you something fierce
You’d better come inside, you’d better come right here.”

But the raindrops falling in the puddle
Won’t stop me running through the street
You won’t find me looking for some cover
And how many times do I have to tell you
That I don’t need no stinking umbrella
I’m gonna run full speed through the gutter 'til I’m soaking
Because this ain’t no small spring shower it’s the real thing

But a cold is gonna catch you, catch you something fierce
You’d better come inside, you’d better come right here
Girl a cold is gonna catch you, catch you while you sleep
Babe the river is rising and the water is getting deep

Hey everybody come on out and get your feet wet
Send old father fear packing
Come on out and make the most of it
They’re gonna tell you to be careful every single day
‘cause if you don’t you’re gonna get yourself hurt, they say
I’ll take the pain, the failure, and that old heartache
Because life is a risk that you have to take

But a cold is gonna catch you, catch you something fierce
You’d better come inside, you’d better come right here___
But the raindrops falling in the puddle
Won’t stop me running through the street___

But the raindrops falling in the puddle
Won’t stop me running through the street
You won’t find me looking for some cover
My mother keeps calling from the porch
She’s gonna scold me later ‘cause she knows of course
Somehow I’m bound to get my feet wet
Track Name: Feast or Famine
Once safe behind a rib-cage
My heart couldn’t be exposed
To those thieves, all strategically charming
You wanted what you couldn’t have
Crowbar in your hand, you came
Leaving no escape for me, darling

Don’t distance, Don’t distance yourself
Take me off of your shelf
Can’t you see, can’t you see
There’s no famine, no feast
There’s no famine, no famine
No

Now it’s safe in your possession
My heart
Somewhere in your house
Just like your keys
Frantic sofa searching
While the panic alarm rings
But if you want the best of me
Don’t strip me to the bone
And just leave all the rest ‘til you’re starving

Don’t distance, Don’t distance yourself
Take me off of your shelf
Can’t you see, can’t you see
There’s no famine, no feast
There’s no famine, no famine
No

You could be rich and happy
Or hopeful and poor
But you’ve only your apathy
I can’t take it anymore

There’s no famine, no feast
There’s no famine
No catch, no release
There’s no famine, no feast
There’s no famine, no famine
No
Track Name: Unresolved
I said it all, I said it all
I told you just how I felt
And it came out like bottled vintage
So refined from all the time spent on the shelf
Oh...

You said it all, You said it all
And like an earthquake in the dark
It shook me once
And then some odd sort of serenity
Stilled my beating heart
Oh...

There was no screaming
No careening
Oh... out of control
If we had only known so very long ago
How not to fall asleep unresolved

I said it all...
What do you mean, things need to change?
Love why don’t you understand my pain?
All of this time I’ve had the same blood running through my veins
It’s not the same, It’s not the same, It’s not the same

Why can’t you open up your eyes and see

That I’ve done everything for you - What have you done for me?
I’ve done everything for you - what have you done for me?
I’ve done everything for you - what have you done for me?
I’ve done everything for you - what have you done for me?

And there was screaming
Oh____ OUT OF CONTROL
We should have guessed that we would never really know
How not to fall asleep unresolved

Is life actually going to be alright?
Baby please don’t cry.
Is life actually going to be alright?
Everything is going to be alright.
I said it all, I said it all, I said it all...
Why can't you understand?
I tried to give you my soul
Are we ever gonna know how not to fall...

Baby, are you still awake?
Track Name: Rending Gowns
Bitterness is a dress I don’t wear too well
With the delicate lace in my face
And the velvet black
And porcelain skin may be so flawless and fair
But it’s also breakable

Submissiveness is a dress
Every mirror knows the sight
It’s so becoming of a well-bred woman
To be gracefully gliding down the halls
In satin white

I found myself a needle and thread
I pricked my finger and it bled
Unsteady hands rending gowns to tattered shreds
Fashioned me a dress
Of crimson red
Track Name: Just a Song
I’m so guilty of replaying moments in my head
And wondering what I should have done or said
But that one was perfect with your hand resting on my back
To calm my trembling breath
Before I walked away and swore that I’d forget
But I could not forget

And who can I tell it to?
Not you, love
Not anyone
No, some things are better left
Just bottled in the bottom of my soul
Or I could write it in a song
And all the crowd will sing along
And they might wonder if its written from experience or not
From experience or not

I only dreamed of growing up throughout my childhood
But now I wish I owned the world again
And everyone I know is watching closely “Is she gonna break?
She’s resting on a hairpin trigger. Everything’s at stake.”
But I’m so guilty of wearing my heart like a scarlet gown
Sparkling in the lights for everyone to see
And this undivided audience
You know too much, you know too much
This guitar’s gone and got the best of me

And who can I tell it to?
Not you, love
Not anyone
No, some things are better left
Just bottled in the bottom of my soul
Or I could write it in a song
And all the crowd will sing along
And they might wonder if its written from experience or not

And when will this song be just a song?
Oh when will this song be just a song?
It’s just a song

I’m so guilty of replaying moment in my head
Again and again and again, love
I cannot forget
Track Name: House of Gold
House of gold, this precious metal
Sun don’t penetrate, no window frames built in
Only me inside my prison
Seeing a much grander vision of myself
No doors to let you in
Why would I when luxury is company enough for me

Birds and clouds and airplanes flying overhead
While I am lying to myself believing they are mine
And I’m sure this house of gold will buy me happiness
In time

House of gold that sparkles in the gleam
Of every lowly passer’s dream
They look, but I don’t see them
Filthy crowded streets can keep them

House of gold as night draws nearer
Dressing to impress my mirrors
They adore
Dinner by the fireplace
I need no beggar’s warm embrace

Silver stars and airplanes flying overhead
While I am lying in a bed to fit ten lovers
Only me beneath the covers
There’s no need for useless petty thieves
When luxury is company enough for me

Here I rest inside my palace
Void of anger, pain, or malice
Void of love, an empty chalice

House of gold, this precious metal
Sun don’t penetrate, no window frames built in
Only me inside my cell
This hell that I have built myself
I’ve everything I need
Yes, luxury is company enough...
Track Name: Half Life
I went to the doctor with a question on my mind the other night, but when I asked he said “Girl, you’d better go and find someone else. I’m not a specialist of that kind.”

And when the doctor couldn’t help I went to the mechanic and said “I’m broken inside.”
But he said “M’am I guess I don’t understand. I’m only a man. I make machines work when I can.” When I can

Then up stepped the scientist, said “Let me try at this. I specialize in answering questions when no one can explain.”

So I sighed and asked him “Why do I feel this way?”

He said “Emotions are just chemicals in your brain, and chemical’s decay after a moment in a test tray. And everything has a brief moment when it flourishes before it starts to die - It’s called a half-life. Now if you squint very carefully with your eye you’ll see the process by which everybody tries to survive. But the rules of science are swift and true, and nobody can undo them as hard as they try.” As hard as they try

And the isotopes under the microscope
Taught me everything I’ll ever need to know
Except how to let go

There’s a butterfly with it’s wing torn off crawling ‘round in the dirt
Through the greenhouse of my thoughts
And when the little girl cries to see it that way
Her momma says “Butterflies only live two weeks anyway.”
Her half-life came five days ago
While she was in the sun making love by the window
For all we know... For all we know
She might have been destined to die alone

There’s a sullen girl in a world apart
Writing poems with a pencil on the white walls in the dark
She says “I know my weapon’s just a harmless tool.”
But still the brilliant fool who bound the tree to the charcoal
Never knew what it would do
Her half-life came about an hour ago
While she was on her knees saying prayers to the radio
But the song she wanted to hear did not exist
And with her angry fists she couldn’t write the words to make it whole

Half-life, what a lovely decay of words
And all the doctors enter the room with their pills and their cures
But nature takes what nature wants to keep
For all we know... For all we know tonight I might just sleep
Track Name: Dreamer's Lament
Lonesome is the dreamer who stares up into the night sky
And watches the face of the moon
Friendly eyes are gazing back down
Ears intently listen to hear the small dreamer’s sad tune

"I dream of the love of a beautiful maid
And of three little children to laugh and to play
Hear this poor humble dreamer and please grant me this
The love of a family is my only wish"

The moon saw the hope in the poor dreamer’s eyes
And he granted him all that he asked
The dreamer rejoiced and he went on his way
Five years passed and the dreamer came back

"I dream of a house with a room for each child
Fancy dresses and jewels for my wife
Hear this poor humble dreamer
And please grant me riches enough for a comfortable life"

The moon saw the hope in the poor dreamer’s eyes
And he granted him all that he asked
The dreamer rejoiced and he went on his way
Ten year passed, and the dreamer came back

"Dear friend, you have granted me all that I hoped for
But something’s still missing I fear
I know just what I need to bring happiness
Please, I have just one more prayer if you’ll hear
I dream of the love of another more fair
Than the woman who lies in my bed
I dream of the riches of castles and kings
Of a gold crown of jewels on my head
And I dream, and my dreams, they are all I believe
They are all that I ever have known
They won’t leave me alone"

Lonesome is the dreamer who stares up into the night sky
And watches the face of the moon

"I long for the face of that beautiful maid
And those three little children, they’ve all gone away
Yes, the one final wish of this foolish old man
Is the same as the first when my dreaming began"